Stuff I Wish You'd Quit Saying: No Offense But You Are 1

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: No Offense But You Are

Stuff I wish you’d quit saying: No Offense But You Are… Truly, this is a precursor to an insult. The statement, “No offense but…” Was never followed by: “You’re gorgeous! So perfectly thin! And your kids are so well behaved!” Ever. I’d rather just be insulted up front. Just surprise me with, “you’re old to be still fighting acne!” The, “No offense, but you should try Proactive!” is the coward’s way. And if you have the mindset to say: “no …

Stuff I Wish You'd Quit Saying: I Hate Joel Osteen 1

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: I Hate Joel Osteen

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying Day 13 “I Hate Joel Osteen” I had 15 requests in regards to Joel Osteen. Some were “I wish people would stop hating on Joel Osteen.” The rest were… uh, hating on Joel Osteen. I couldn’t stop thinking about this and I admit I had chicken scratched Joel Osteen in my side notes as a “possible” topic. Joel kept getting in my way. Commercials, this and that in my news feed, and finally I …

Stuff I Wish You'd Quit Saying: He Was Such a Good Christian… 6

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: He Was Such a Good Christian…

Stuff I Wish You’d Stop Saying: He was Such a Good Christian Our two and four-year-old sons, the vandals, are a mischievous duo.  But the younger of the two… heaven and earth. From toilets full of  Captain Crunch and marshmallows to flooded laundry rooms, the boy is his own kind of trouble. If the four-year-old says, “Charwglie is beening bad!” We grab a fire extinguisher, a rosary, and a plunger – cause it has officially hit the fan, and probably …

i cant

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: I Can’t…

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying… I can’t. The other day, after only 4 hours of sleep, I had an “I can’t…” moment. It lasted all day. The three-year-old refused to come out of the bathroom because he didn’t want me to see him naked. I literally gave him a bath last night. The 2-year-old insists on wearing Batman underwear OVER his clothes. I change his diaper and get him dressed, and he throws a walleyed fit until I put …

Stuff I Wish You'd Quit Saying: Would You Ask God for Me? 2

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: Would You Ask God for Me?

Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: Would You Ask God for Me? Our son Sam, the oldest of our dangerous duo we call the Vandals, is a pretty quirky little dude. He has been known to use an entire roll of toilet paper to clean his wee bum. If legalistic were in human form it would be embodied in the great Sam-I-Am. If he gets in trouble, and I put him in time out, he insists on staying the full …

Never say this to me...

We’ve Been Up All Night Vomiting…

Day 8 Stuff I Wish You’d Quit Saying: We’ve Been Up All Night Vomiting… It is without a doubt, the one thing I NEVER want you to hear you say to me.  “We’ve been up all night vomiting.” Last year I was slain by the sisterhood of vomit haters. Furthermore, I was shocked to learn how many people are wandering the streets after having been up all night, VOMITING! What is wrong with people?  And! How are they able to …