The Care and Keeping of a Mean Girl 2
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The Care and Keeping of a Mean Girl

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The care and keeping of a mean girl.

At a recent doctor’s appointment, I learned my physician suspected that the greatest health crisis I was facing was… dehydration.

That’s right, I am thirsty.

I consider myself fairly intelligent when it comes to health and nutrition.  I confess I am embarrassed by this diagnosis.  Alas, I knew he was correct.  And the fact of the matter is, I don’t have time to drink eight, 8 oz. glasses of water a day.  On the days I do get that much water in my thirsty body, I don’t have time to make it to the bathroom in an efficient ratio of water in, urine out… so I am fairly miserable for 90% of the 64 ounces.

Needless to say, I left my doctor’s office feeling defeated, depleted and discouraged.

There isn’t any way that my scale can be ten pounds lower than his. Is he just a vindictive mad scientist?  I sat in my car and had a hale and hearty cry and then as I examined myself in the mirror, I began to multitask. I reapplied mascara and lip gloss while listing all things I find most awful about myself.

Fat.
Loser.
Lazy.
Dehydrated.
Whiner.

Horrible at math, mostly weights and measures.

Exasperated.
Phony.

And the worst of all… mean.

I am a very mean girl.

And I called the friend who was babysitting our young son and two foster placements and told her I would be there in an hour. Then, I went to the store and bought her a lovely fall floral arrangement and the ingredients to put a fragrant squash soup in her crockpot for dinner. Crusty bread and an apple pie were added to my basket.

I would take great care of my friend for helping me.


On my way to the checkout, I stopped and grabbed chocolates for my sister, my husband’s favorite cookies, and the children’s favored frozen pizza.  I scurried to the other side of the store and thoughtfully picked lovely greeting cards to bless my friends, our foster-daughter’s birth mom, and her caseworker too.  Just before I checked out, I filled my basket with an abundance of toiletries for our three oldest children who are busy doing the almost grown-up thing. Then I made my way to the gift wrapping aisle to find bright colored bags to put the shampoos, shaving gels, creams, lotions, and deodorants in;  if I hurried, I could leave the bags at their dorms before I picked up my babies.

When I climbed back in my car, quite pleased with the purchases, I would bless my darlings with, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Immediately I began to admonish myself, I forgot to grab myself any water.  I rehashed the list of my faults:

Chubby.

Dumb.

Slothful.

Parched.

Grumbler.

Frustrated.

Fake.

And the worst of all… mean.

I am a very mean girl.

About that time my daughter called to ask about my doctor appointment. I reported to her my struggle, and she chirped, “OH MY GOSH MOM!  You must get this new app!  It’s called plant nanny!”

I followed her instructions and downloaded the app. I picked a cute little cartoon plant and begrudgingly entered my weight and read my results. The plant nanny decided how much water I must drink to keep my little imaginary plant conscious alive. The little seedling blinked at me with trusting animated eyes and I cooed at the psychological entrapment that would force me to drink enough water to nurture the cybernetic life into a blooming dependant illusion.

Over the next few days, I became more diligent in my pursuit of water. My iPhone would alert, my little make-believe Japanese succulent would bat her eyes at me, and I would drink, click, and apply “water” to my H2O conscious companion.  ANd I treated that animated being like royalty, then on the 4th day, a tragedy arose.

I lost my phone.

I turned the house upside down, it was nowhere to be found.  Later that evening, I recovered my phone between the  couch cushions.  When I opened the plant nanny app I knew immediately, the app had died of thirst.

Fat.

Loser.

Lazy.

Dehydrated.

Killer of simulated Japanese succulents…

And the familiar voice hummed in my ears, “You are so mean… you were so good to tend to that imaginary plant.  I love how kind you are so kind to your neighbors, orphans, and caseworkers. And how you observe such careful and tedious attention to everyone, but you are so mean to My girl.”

I know this to be true.

The things that come out of my mouth toward myself are brutal. The TLC I afford those around me is stellar.

The attention I bestowed upon the animated succulent … was criminal compared to the neglected efforts I make to grab myself, His girl – an artless glass of water.

And you are so mean to... my girl. Click To Tweet

I am most convicted of this, I may look as though I love my neighbor… but how could I possibly when I so blatantly despise myself?  How can I be so hard and ugly to the daughter of the Most High?  How can I spend so much energy on what I deem righteous and be so cruel to myself?  He who died for me, that I might be called blameless… His girl. I agreed with Him. It was not what He wanted for me. He wants me to recognize, I am clothed in His goodness. And He sees me as perfected. He adores me as His own.

I have neglected the gift of my inheritance, daughter of Jehovah.  And I deleted my plant nanny app. Then I applied mascara and powdered my nose.  I grabbed my glass off the table and filled it with new water.

Water that this beautiful girl needs to bless the nations with wealth, prosperity and the Good News of Jesus Christ.

A champion for the little guy, a woman on a mission. Refreshed and adequately warned, don’t mess with His girl.

May your floors be sticky and your calling ordained. Love, Jami

And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a slain offering and sacrifice to God – a sweet fragranceEphesians 5: 2

You might also love: Dear Mean Girl

And listen here to our latest podcast: You can’t photoshop and ugly personality!

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11 Comments

  1. Breea Heiner says:

    I was sitting in the airport, charging my phone and quietly crying while I read this post. Again you have spoken my words before I knew they needed to be spoken. Again I have found solace, and again you made me cry. Thank you, and yes I forgive you for making me look even more like an idiot, crying while I wait for my ride. Of course, I jest. Thank you again for sharing the words spoken so tenderly to your heart with those of us who need to hear them too.

    1. jami_amerine says:

      God bless you in your travels. ❤️

  2. Glenna McKelvie says:

    Yes,.. please, drink,.. and be kind to his girl! Speak kindly
    to her! Buy her flowers and praise her! Remind her she is
    his creation!

  3. Don McKelvie says:

    Love.

  4. Yes – me too.
    Thank you

  5. Michelle Marshall says:

    At first read I thought, “I don’t think I have that problem; I think too much of myself!” Then I remembered how just last night I was in the pit of despond as I beat myself up for not saved better for Christmas, and now my kids would…well, I don’t know, but it wouldn’t be positive! I’m such a failure at this every -single-year! “How could I be so selfish as to not plan better?” Now there is some truth to the lack of planning part, but really? My kids won’t be ruined with a present less than they wanted or expected. Oy Vey! Thank you, Jami.

  6. Julie Richmond says:

    So true!
    Great reminder!!!

  7. I think it is s true, much easier to be kind to others… it’s a struggle when I’m not where I want to be, and failed yet another week of dieting
    Trying to remember He sees my heart, water bottle in hand I’m off to work, blessings

  8. PattiLu says:

    Loved your post. Idea:
    everywhere I go I take a bottle of water, in my purse, in the car, and I end up drinking on the go. A lot of water. And at every meal. It has worked! 4 to 8 bottles a day… easy.

  9. Katherine Fuentes says:

    Being consistent is so very hard in many areas of life, especially in regards to our own well being! Thus, we are often sitting ducks of the enemy who loves to run destructively through our self esteem! I try to remember being advised on airplanes to put O2masks on yourself first. This allows us to be able to help our children with their masks! Take care of yourself, being kind and thoughtful, and you’ll be able to give more completely to others!

  10. […] Read the rest of Jami’s post here: The Care and Keeping of a Mean Girl […]

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