Health and happiness.
Two things I often attribute conditional… one to the other.
My post yesterday had me thinking about another aspect of my time in Venezuela and an open-air hotel room on the coast.
Two rooms, one for my parents and one for my sister and myself, my dad told us we could pick which room we wanted. The bellboy said, “Por favor, señor, solo esta habitación tiene la iguana…” We knew just enough Spanish to deduct one of the rooms had an iguana and one didn’t.
My sister insisted on the room without the iguana.
So, after a seafood feast on the beach, we made our barefoot journey back to our iguana free suite.
Note to readers: WHEN IN VENEZUELA PICK THE ROOM WITH THE IGUANA.
I am not kidding y’all… the iguana would have shied in comparison to the vast collection of Chernoble sized creepy crawlers we DID NOT SLEEP with that night.
Occasionally, I would doze off and then abruptly wake up because I felt one of the beasts tugging at my pajamas or heard another moving our luggage across the room. Each time my eyes flew open to the Sci-fi terror of South American Costal bug life, I would find my sister staring at me, “Are you asleep? Don’t go to sleep! We have to stay awake! We must keep watch!
To date, it was the longest night of my life. Our parents and their reptilian keeper of the night slept like babies. They emerged the next morning bright eyed and bushy tailed ready to frolic on the beach. Later that evening my sister inquired if we might procure an iguana for our room. They were fresh out, so she asked for a fly-swatter… or shot- gun that we might defend ourselves.
What seemed like a burden or intruder was in fact, a welcomed asset… one we wished we had.
I am struggling, I promised to be honest.
Eight more days in the freedom challenge and I am bouncing between freedom and law. I can’t seem to find my balance. And isn’t this always the case?
A sick foster-love, the passing of an elderly aunt, the pre-order launch of my book on Amazon and Goodreads… the fallout criticism – even though it has never been read… tight yoga pants, Valentine’s day candy, an allergy attack… one thing, after another and no good iguana to catch the ick and afford me rest.
Constantly going, and what seems… never the needed break.
And all things are permissible – but what is beneficial? Sometimes, I lie and answer, “the benefit is in the quick fix.”
But the truth is I need a plan. I need a monitor to watch while I rest. I need the guidance of a protecting force that will show me the blessing of boundary. And the good news is… I have it.
The one thing I have been missing in my pursuit of health and happiness is the Holy Spirit.
The bottom line is that navigating what is permissible with that which is beneficial sometimes falls prey to me seeing the benefit in something I want… instead of that which I need.
We are not alone friends. We are not alone in our trials. We are not alone in the hurt… or the madness. I won’t go back to a place where I believed I was in trouble or that I had caused God to turn from me.
Nothing can separate Him from me.
Nothing is too big or too awful for Him to help me overcome.
He is the effective force in a room full of crunchy bugs. The ick and the ewwwww of my folly, temptation and trials don’t test His limits.
Beloved, the one thing standing between us and health and happiness is UNBELIEF.
Believing Him and in His good work on the Cross is the core of wellness. Yes, I falter and then I turn, repent and move forward because I was made for more.
I am welcome at the table as daughter… not servant.
And inside my elaborate open-air room by the sea, there is a helper – He watches over me and guides me in ways of health, hope, healing and wellness.
Just like He promised.
This Monday ask Him to show you the beneficial and lead you in ways you haven’t known. I am looking forward to His loving guidance in a whole new way.
May your floors be sticky and your room have an iguana. Love, Jami
1 Corinthians 10:23 Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.
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