“Excuse me?” I ask.
“Are you just a mom? Or do you work outside the home?” The stranger inquired. “Um.” I truly wish I was more confrontational at this point. I manage to spatter out, “I am just a mom….”
Given the opportunity to do it over again I might say something like this:
Yes, sub human fool, I am just a mom. I have 6 children, but even if I only had one, I would still be just a mom. I am responsible for the survival of human beings. I accomplish more between 4:00 am and 6:30 am, than you do in a week. By time you roll yourself out of bed for your shower, I have had time alone with Jesus – which keeps me cool when people ask me ridiculous questions and enables me to – pack 4 lunches, make 2 smoothies, a pound of bacon, 2 whipped lattes and one mocha frap, and no, I do not work at the IHOP. I have a pot roast in the crock pot and potatoes on to boil. It won’t be until about 1:30 this afternoon that I realize I haven’t eaten anything. I might get something in my stomach before bed. About the time you step out of your shower, I have started a load of wash and fed a baby. I am dressed with hair and make up and the kids are in the car, back packs and all, by 7:30. I will deliver them safely to school by 8:00. They are pressed, dressed, and ready to impress. Their homework is done. They are ready to spell, add, subtract, solve for X, diagram, parse, and they can name the states, Capitols too, if need be.
I will not tell you if I will now head to the court house, to prosecute offenders, or defend the wrongly accused. Or maybe I am a nurse or a dentist. Perhaps I am a director, and I was up until midnight last night putting the final touches on a play, so that you might be entertained. Or maybe I am a waitress…. I might just touch your eggs. For all you know I am just a mom AND I am a teacher and, in addition to the aforementioned, I planned out your child’s entire academic future…
In. My. Sleep.
Maybe I am headed to the grocery store with $250… to feed a family of 8 …for a week. There are flowers in a vase on the dining room table. My house smells like Martha Stewart lives here; you could only wish you ate so well. When you “get off work” I am just getting vamped up for dinner, dishes, home work, preteen counseling, teen counseling, 4 time outs, baths, story time, prayer time, and “check for monsters under my bed” time.
On second thought, I wont bother defending my life as just a mom. I am very busy, as I must perpetuate mankind… I don’t have time to chit chat…
But I hope you have a lovely day.